Drama Queen- Life without Lifey

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“Mom! I think you are in love with the Lifey”, My son scolds me. “Appa! I think she loves Lifey more than she loves all of us put together!”, lassoing my husband into the argument. He nods from his usual seat behind the laptop, as usual unclear whether he is in agreement with the kids or he has just understood the concept dictated by the webpage. “You’ve had Lifey in your life for less than a year and you care about that dumb head more than us, you fatty?”, the little one pipes in, totally annoyed, standing in his Vitruvian man position except with his hands in his imaginary pockets.

“Mom! I think you are in love with the Lifey”, My son scolds me. “Appa! I think she loves Lifey more than she loves all of us put together!”, lassoing my husband into the argument. He nods from his usual seat behind the laptop, as usual unclear whether he is in agreement with the kids or he has just understood the concept dictated by the webpage. “You’ve had Lifey in your life for less than a year and you care about that dumb head more than us, you fatty?”, the little one pipes in, totally annoyed, standing in his Vitruvian man position except with his hands in his imaginary pockets.

Lifey is my awesome cellphone, short for Lifeline. It is true, I love him. He is invaluable. He is priceless. He is amazing. He is so perfect for my palms and even the softest touch of my fingers, sets him into action at top speed. (Unlike the other men in my life who require many reminders and warnings before which something gets done. Lifey reminds me to remind them too. How convenient!) He makes me a better person: never letting my poor memory ruin my commitments or the birthday wishes, helping me keeping in touch with family and friends, letting me snap away with abandon the situations and scenery that I never want to forget in my life! And yeah, he lets me talk to other people too, when I am bored crooning over him. Though, he never lets me get bored with unimaginable volumes of music, videos, games all with recommendations that perfectly suit my taste (“Thats google invading your privacy and databasing every detail about you”, shouted my son once, but who can resist, right? when the stereo quality is exquisite, display so damn crystal clear and the game perfectly suited for me in every way!) 

“He is not a dumb head guys, he is a Smart phone”, I cooed, more to my Lifey, than to my kids”And I am not fat, Lifey says that I eat right and walk enough to keep me fit”. “I need your phone for a day, just for tomorrow. For Work”, My husband said. Appending the last two words which wins over every damn argument. My kids faces were resplendent with glee. “Justice…” someone dared to say.

If you love something, let it free, if it comes back, its yours, if not, it was never meant to be. Let me see how we fare, Lifey- you and me. I am setting you free… Tears swelling in my eyes. 

Life without Lifey was not that bad. I happened to get more things done in shorter time, spent a nice long time with my Cuties and Beauties (my plants and fishes), even made sambhar that tasted kinda nice, finished a drawing, played board games with my kids and re-read my favorite Rebecca. (by Daphne Du Maurier).

But he came back and when I had him cradled in my arms that evening, Lifey was back in business, reminding me of the birthday wishes to be sent, arranging a get together for a friend who was moving, emailing the counselor of the SAT details and reminding me to remind the kids to take out the trash. After a quick scream to get them to move, I was happy to see, Lifey even logged more than 5000 steps for me that day and had given me a star for my effort!

True love. I say. Drama Queen, my kids call me.

N for No cellphone day for ABC Wednesday



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